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Articles from Petroville

Yoga Erotica 2007-09-10 13:21:06 This morning, I attended my first ever yoga class. I have been wanting to try it for a while now so when I saw flyers go up at my daughter’s dance studio, I called right away. It was a wonderful session. The instructor did an excellent job explaining each pose as we went along and I felt very strong and successful during every part of the hour. I also felt a little hot under the yoga pants. At first, this threw me a bit so I had a conversation with myself. What the hell? Am I perhaps a tad a la Ellen DeGeneres? No way. Relax, Kimberly. You’re so not gay. Then why am I all horned up and ready to roll during a yoga class full of only women? It’s probably the same as when you go for a massage. You get quite turned on then too. Yes, but that has to do with being rubbed with oil and the candles and the music… Being in tune with your body, experiencing the soft tones and the deep breathing may generate the same response. You’re not gay. If you’re sure. ...

Pillow Fight 2007-09-07 23:00:16 Not sure which is funnier - the dog or the 8 year old giggling… How do you think it ended? ...

Redskins Reprogramming 2007-09-06 18:00:26 In honor of the NFL season beginning tonight and Sunday’s 1983 Superbowl rematch, today’s post is about football. Well, kind of… As an 80’s school girl living a stone’s throw from the White House, saying no to drugs was just about as important as the Redskins. Just about. Being a Redskins fan came as naturally to me as breathing air and hauling ass after the ice cream man. Back when we had men in our family, they were all die hard fans. Seeing as though I hung out with the men on Sunday afternoons, due to the cooking and knitting that went on upstairs, it rubbed off very early and heavily. Sundays were sacred: mass and football. Combine them both and it was almost a High Holy Day in our modest middle class abode. Hail Mary and Hail to the Redskins. Amen. Wanna read the rest? It gets better. Click on over to the DC Metro Moms Blog and show me your team spirit. ...

Throw All The Damn Toys Away! 2007-09-05 16:31:49 I knew there was more than something wrong with this toy when my daughter came home with it from her grandmother’s last year. It was a “gimmie gift”. You know, the kind that the weak and elderly (sorry Mom) are prone to give because the words “Hell NO!” don’t roll off of their tounges as easily anymore. And then we parents are left to suffer… Any toy that sells the dog poop with the dog is questionable if you ask me. And then I discovered that the dog poo also doubles as food for your new Barbie pup. Ummmm, that’s really and totally gross, Mattel. What are you telling our children here? The good news is that after a year of finding magnetic Barbie puppy poo all over the house, I get to toss the whole freaking lot…and with good reason! If you haven’t heard, Mattel announced it’s THIRD recall today. Check it out and then toss the poo. ...

Living in the D.C. 2007-09-04 23:00:46 Announcing The Launch of DC Metro Moms Blog Source: DC Metro Moms Blog We are thrilled to announce the “official” launch of the DC Metro Moms Blog, a collaborative group of moms writing about their lives in Washington, D.C.; where moms live and work in the shadow of the Capitol, Beltway driving is the adventure sport of choice, the Mall is flanked by national monuments instead of anchor stores, and bipartisan playdates easily gain constituency approval. The DC Metro Moms Blog is building a community of mom bloggers, voices, and resources for and about families living in the DC Metro area and its suburbs. The DC Metro Moms Blog is the second offshoot of the popular (and sometimes controversial) Silicon Valley Mom’s Blog. In April 2007, Silicon Valley Moms Blog launched its first sister site, the Chicago Moms Blog, where some 25 ladies by the lake are keeping it lively. For a continually updated list with bios of DC Metro Moms Blog contributors, please visit our About Us section. ...

A Perfect Post ~ August ‘07 2007-09-04 04:30:29 Welcome to the August 2007 Perfect Post Awards! My Co-Hostess, Lindsay, and I would like to welcome you to year # 2 of the Perfect Post Awards - “the power to the blogger awards” because you make it all happen. In February of 2006, we popped the champagne and rolled out the red carpet for you to pat one another on the backside. Here we are today still lavishing in the good feeling of such a supportive community. Our mission statement has been simple and we like it that way. The Perfect Post Awards are a chance to read some of the best stuff written each month- and to spread a little warm fuzziness, too. If you’d like to present an award next month, e-mail me and I’ll send you the latest award button code a few days before the 1st. If you’re interested in looking through our past award posts, they can be found here. Thanks to each and every one of you for making the Perfect Post Awards such a great success!! And now without further adieu, my Perfect Post Awa ...

So ? 2007-08-31 14:22:27 Whaddaya think? Don’t I look bee-u-ti-ful? Many thanks to Leanne for once again draping me in deliciousness. I think I have very good taste in friends, don’t you? My taste in husbands isn’t so bad either. Today the old man and I are celebrating 13 years of wedded craziness that began in front the Clark County, Nevada Justice of the Peace at the tender ages of 21 & 23. Wow…I would so totally kill my daughter if she pulled that crap. ...

Good Things Fallin’ 2007-08-29 12:57:10 With the Labor Day weekend approaching, so goes what’s left of Summer. Of course, officially, the season does not change until September 23rd - but who the hell has time to wait for the leaves to begin to fall ? No, sir. I’m ready. Fall brings many good things in it’s bounty. The kids are back to school and a routine of some semblance resumes. This forces further organization and less corking off. Clean out your desk and quit your whining! Maybe you don’t eat or drink as much and that’s a good thing too. Stay sober to help with homework and save the massive munchdowns for the holidays. You have time to actually exercise and you could even try doing it outside and not melt. Walk those dogs for heaven’s sake! All very good things. Here in Petroville, a change is on the horizon as well. My Fall design is only a day or so away from gracing you with it’s pretty presence. Hard to wait, isn’t it? (Hint: MommaK is dead.) Also, a project I&rsquo ...

Sunny Days and Migraines 2007-08-28 16:10:10 …make evil lasers shoot from my eyes. I couldn’t figure out why I was so shaky this morning. I kept messing up as I taught class and a few times felt like I was about to lose my balance from just being light headed. After class, and into the sunny day it all began to make a migraine of sense. I always see spots when I’m about to get a killer migraine but I hadn’t had one in years. I was relieved to know what was behind my foul feelings but in one heck of a hurry to get home and into a dark room. After some Excedrin Migraine and a brief nap, my head still feels quite raw but I’m over the worst of it…and lucky for me, just in time to help with math homework. Do you suffer from migraines? Do you know your triggers? What’s your best remedy? ...

Random Mental Inventory 2007-08-26 18:14:56 You can totally skip this one. Heavy headed today so I’m letting it spill: Kids start school tomorrow. How do I have a 7th grader and a 3rd grader? It always makes me sad to see them go off on that first day back. How are they so old already? Saturday night polo got rained out after only and hour so the whole crew ended up back at our house. Things got really crazy after an intense game of Cranium when my friend and I danced with the 8 year olds for over an hour. We boogied our fool asses off to the songs “Lip Gloss” & the Spice Girls classic “Wannabe” over and over again. There was a Fly Girls meets the Go-Go’s kind of vibe going on. Don’t ask me why…besides how fun it was. Thinking about taking a yoga class. Yep. Once a week. Pretty sure Lil got drunk last night. (Mary don’t yell at me.) Still reading the new Harry Potter book. Today I ate 3 finger nails and half a bag of sour patch kids while I gobbled up 5 chapters. Harr ...

Manscaping 2007-08-24 07:26:32 Oh, the Google hits I shall receive… A phone call from husband on the way home from work: Hello? Hey. Hi. Hey, what do you know about men shaving… down there? What? What the hell? You know…seriously…have you heard that men… you know like… (pause, pause…he’s struggling here) shave their private areas? You mean manscaping? (another pause) Oh my God! I can’t believe this…I gotta go. What? Why? What are you even talking about? Ugh…I’ll be home soon. Love you. (click) Upon further discussion that night, I discovered that my husband had never heard of “manscaping”. (We’re both blondes with no excessive hair issues - thank God.) What was funnier than the phone call was how upset he was about it. To him, not knowing somehow meant he was behind the curve, no longer on the cutting edge…getting old. While I busied myself, plugged my ears and sang the smurf song, he called his friends and to ...

Mail Booty 2007-08-22 12:06:45 Oh, how I likes me some booty. Since my return home from BlogHer, I have received quite a few fun goodies in the mail. Most were birthday gifts from gorgeous women but one was a tardy party favor. Can you guess ? In honor of delicious mail booty, I am hosting a little game. I will be packaging up one of the above items and mailing it off to a mystery someone. And as usual, there are rules. 1) When you receive your Mail Booty you must take a picture of the contents and post it on your blog with a link to the sender. 2) Then (here’s the delish part) you get to fill the Mail Booty bag with treasures of your own to share and mail it off to another mystery someone. 3) Rinse and repeat. Sound fun? I know. Update: If I don’t already have your mailing address and you feel comfortable sending it, shoot it my way. I’ll draw my mystery someone & mail the inaugural booty on Friday. ...

Dear Nana 2007-08-21 13:41:57 Here I sit, feverish & blowing my nose, trying to think of what to write for your commemorative beach book. The party organizer asked that we each submit a few paragraphs about our memories with you during your 30 years of summers on the Delaware shore. Seeing as how I have been visiting you there since I was just a wee tot, I should have much to share. And I do…but I’m torn. Maybe blocked is a better word for it. Actually, angry is truly the case. You see, just yesterday my mother (your daughter) called me sounding as if she had been run over by a truck. She asked me to listen to a phone message that you had left for her. I could hardly believe my ears. Your words were so hurtful and disrespectful that I can still feel the smack of them on my mother’s cheek. I have no idea why you choose to lash out at those who care for you the most. You have been allowed to behave this way for as long as I have known you, choosing whom to favor and whom to scorn. You ostraciz ...

What Up, B? 2007-08-19 13:21:49 So, the tat’s not real although I do get a strange and sexy satisfaction sporting it around for a a week or two until it fades. Last summer, I got another airbrushed job - my husband’s name in huge letters on my arm (like he has for real with my name). It felt deliciously Joliezy. I like to tease myself with actually getting another tattoo but I doubt I’ll ever pull the trigger. Who knows though…this getting older stuff is weird. The beach was fun, actually. We ended up staying across the street from Nana’s condo at the Holiday Inn which turned the trip around completely. Usually, my grandmother would have balked at the idea of us staying anywhere but with her and the frozen food from WWII but since she recently put her condo on the market (thank the Lord above), we were able to hide under the guise of being out of the way in case she needed to show the place. It worked like a charm. Speaking of family, gatherings of it’s members can be so sticky a ...

Caption Me This 2007-08-17 12:02:31 ...