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Articles from Petroville

Animal House 2007-10-03 19:46:08 We moved into this house in May of ‘06 and felt like throwing a party. Finally, we could have people over and be proud of our merry crib. Finally, we could fit over 10 people into our home without feeling claustrophobic. Happily, we could even invite a few friends to stay over because this house offers our first ever guest room in which to store them. And party, we did. In the last calendar year, we averaged a party a month. The gatherings have ranged from the sophisticated to the out of freaking control but this time…this time I think we’re in trouble. What was supposed to be a friendly cocktail party for my husband’s sales team has turned toga. Yes, I’m serious and I need help. He (he: meaning my crazy ass spouse) has turned a corner. Never in a million years would I have pegged him for a costume kind of guy and now he’s even talking party games! What the hell? So, I am doing the only thing I can think to do when the time is ticking away and m ...

Just the Other Day, I Thought… 2007-10-02 11:03:16 Wow, I’ve had a really clear complexion lately. I mean, I haven’t broken out like a greasy 15 year old for weeks now! Maybe I’m finally going to have that grown up skin I’ve always wanted. Yesterday I woke up with a herpee sized zit on my face. And it’s one of those sexy backed pimples that will be there a while. Hmmmmm, it’s been months since Jack has had an accident in the house. I’m so thankful for that puppy stage to be behind us! Who knew a Great Dane could hold so much urine? This morning I found him in my pee flooded office looking very guilty (but comfortable) on the dry half of my expensive and now smelly oriental rug. You know, I’m probably going to be in incredible shape in no time with all of these extra classes I’m teaching. Today alone I worked out for 3 hours! Go me! I’ve gained 3 pounds. Muscle, my ass! I offer you this as evidence against thinking positive. I believe it’s a total sham. ...

A Perfect Post - September ‘07 2007-10-01 04:45:02 Welcome to the September 2007 Perfect Post Awards! My Co-Hostess, Lindsay, and I would like to welcome you to year # 2 of the Perfect Post Awards - “the power to the blogger awards” because you make it all happen. In February of 2006, we popped the champagne and rolled out the red carpet for you to pat one another on the backside. Here we are today still lavishing in the good feeling of such a supportive community. Our mission statement has been simple and we like it that way. The Perfect Post Awards are a chance to read some of the best stuff written each month- and to spread a little warm fuzziness, too. If you’d like to present an award next month, e-mail me and I’ll send you the latest award button code a few days before the 1st. If you’re interested in looking through our past award posts, they can be found here. Thanks to each and every one of you for making the Perfect Post Awards such a great success!! And now without further adieu, my Perfect Post ...

Such a Blonde 2007-09-29 22:57:22 Today was an all day Jazzercise day. I woke up and taught the 8:45am class - which is no real treat on a Saturday but I worked it proper and sweaty. Then I headed to our district meeting which is held twice a year at the local community college. For the first part of the meeting, they had us working out so you know I smelled utterly delish. Meanwhile, I’m all trying to be cheery and say hello to people when this girl comes up and says, “I’m sorry but I have to interrupt. I just love your blog. You are so funny! You totally got me through my workshop. I’m ___________ (whahwhahwhah) and I just wanted to say hello..” or something like that - maybe better. I don’t know because I was so stunned that I think I lost bladder control for a bit. I mean…freaking WOW. I have no clue who this chic is (even though she told me her name and I wrote it on my hand so as not to forget to google her later but ended up washing it off by accident) but she made m ...

Damn Fam Spam 2007-09-28 02:03:27 During a conversation with my wise and dear cousin, who lives too far away from me in Okinawa, I had another brilliant idea. First of all, I have to tell you how very much I miss my cousin. You know, I don’t have enough good friends in this world that truly get me without judgement to have one of them occupying space in a freaking foreign country! I love that we are cheap therapy for each other as well as evil half sisters at heart. We have always been two sides of a coin but now as mothers and adults, our connection is amazing. Okay, I’ll move on now but she seriously needs to move back here dammit! Enough said. We were talking about our family, as usual, when the subject of my not-so-favorite uncle came up. He and his lovely wife (no, I am not willing to claim her as kin) run a tax accounting office in Bumfrick, MD where they seem to have received the titles of King and Queen of the county, or so you would think after spending any time with them. Anywho, that’s ter ...

Fall Sights & Smells 2007-09-26 00:00:05 A colorful sunset enjoyed over the mouthwatering smell of a barbecue. The scene made me risk burning dinner to dash inside for my camera. The sun was setting over the mountains while the moon kept me company. How do you better capture the beauty you see with your own eye? I need further schooling on this tool I so fancy. My first attempt at grilling steak was a success - even with all of the picture taking. Are you ready for Fall? What does yours look like? ... Amp

From the World of My 8 Year Old 2007-09-24 13:48:52 “I don’t understand why Britney has to be such a bad mom… …I mean, Mommy does Jazzercise up on stage every day and she’s still a good mom.” ...

Eye of the Tiger 2007-09-23 13:29:39 It was a beautiful afternoon as I walked from the grocery store into the crowded parking lot outside. My 8 year old buckled up while chatting with me over the seat as I stacked the plastic bags inside the back of the car. All of a sudden, I heard a voice behind me. “Excuse me?” I whirled around and gasped. “You just scared the crap out of me!” “Sorry”, the strange (as in stranger) woman said and we both let out a little nervous laughter. I am calm but not always witty in these situations. I am, however, vigilant. As much as it freaks me out to be approached in a parking lot, I took a moment to study the woman before me. She looked to be in her mid-thirties, dressed in normal looking jeans and a t-shirt, carrying one grocery bag and a rather large purse. At this point, I was totally positive that she was going to ask me for directions. I was wrong. “Hi. Um..I just live up a road a bit and I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind giving me a ...

Would You Kid Nation? 2007-09-21 23:00:21 Hey! I was on the radio yesterday morning giving my opinion about the new reality show Kid Nation. Hop, skip and jump on over to the DC Metro Moms Blog and read the details. I’m so hardly almost barely famous. ...

And The Worst Winner Is… 2007-09-21 05:30:38 With 79 votes, the winner is…Lori from Glass Half Full! You have to see how drop dead gorgeous she is now, though. Lori, I will be mailing you the itunes $15 gift card as well as some snapfish goodies from Marcie @ My Two Boys and The Chicago Moms Blog, Thanks Marcie! And thanks to all that entered and voted. Identities revealed below! ...

The Worst of 2007 - A Vote 2007-09-19 10:04:36 Here we are, folks. The worst of the worst are pictured below just waiting on your vote. I have not identified the photos because I want to encourage you all take a guess and also add a caption, if you pretty please. Poll will close Thursday night and the winner will be announced on Friday. 1. Lori @ Glass Half Full 2. Nancy (Nancy, what’s your blog?) 3. Y @ Joy Unexpected 4. Monty @ The Daily Bitch 5. Chris @ Serendipity Mine 6. Joanne @ PunditMom 7. Black Belt Mama VOTE! Poll - Take Our Poll Do you recognize any of these lovely ladies? How about adding a funny caption for your favorite? I’ll start by leaving my own in the comments section. Have fun! ...

Worst School Picture Contest 2007 2007-09-17 14:51:50 Email Me Your pictures. Click “Contact” above. Just do it! My daughters are both having their picture days at school this week. You know the drill: you pick out a nice outfit, try to not have their hair sticking up and practice smiling with them a few times so they know how you want it to turn out. When you drop them at school they look perfect. Six hours later after having cafeteria tacos for lunch, running around at recess and finger painting all afternoon, they sit for their pictures. What you get back a month later (Portrait Package A - Two 8×10s, Three 5×7 and a Million wallets) looks nothing like the child you sent to school that fine day. But we never learn, right? My mom loved, loved, loved those pink spongy curlers. She would have us sit on her bed while she rolled our hair, wrap a big ol’ scarf around our heads and send us to bed. To her it was like instant coffee, to us it was more like whiplash. Not only did we wake up the next morning and m ...

E-Foot in Mouth 2007-09-14 23:00:25 Ever had yourself a nice toe jam sandwich? Not-so-Yum-o. And so begins year number two of me starting off on the wrong foot with my child’s new teacher. Luckily, this time there wasn’t any cussing involved. I’m looking at that as progress. Hop on over to DC Metro Mom’s Blog to read the details of my latest faux pas. ...

She’s Got Issues 2007-09-13 14:08:30 The she being me and I’m looking to trade them in for a full fledged disorder. I think it was watching the 2 hour premiere of The Biggest Loser last night (Tivo) that relaunched my sick quest to be thin. Or maybe “my quest to be sick thin” is a better way of putting it. I know I’ve turned down the aisle of unhealthy when I call a friend that’s ill with a stomach virus to tell her to breathe in a ziploc baggie and save it for me. Hell, a good puke bug really helps shed a few extra pounds! What? While we’re on the subject, this really pisses me off. Why do those diet commercials say, “Whether you need to lose 100 pounds or just the vanity 10, our plan is for you!” Why is it “vanity” to want to fit into your GD jeans from last winter? I call that being frugal. So, I’m vain for only needing to lose 10 pounds? What am I if I kick you in the shins? And how come eating disorders aren’t contagious? You know who are the l ...

Too or Three 2007-09-12 10:09:42 First of all, it’s way too nice to be sitting inside on day like today. My garden is screaming at me to clean it up and make room for some fall plants. After completing a bit of paperwork and this lousy excuse for a post, I’m off to answer it’s call. There are just too many good shows premiering this week and next. How am I going to keep track of them all? Well, I know I’ll survive because of my beloved TiVo but what if I miss out on one in the very beginning? Leave your list, please, so I can be sure to catch them all. Survivor China, Bionic Woman, Biggest Loser, The Office…what else? It’s almost time for my 3rd annual Worst School Photo Evah! contest. Last year we focused on bad hair. What should it be this year? Get those old 80’s photos out! You wanna play too, right? ...