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Articles from Secret Black Book

Floor protection 2007-08-18 09:46:00 Renting a property makes me very mindful of the care and maintenance of a house. Hence, i am starting to find hardwood floors more than a little distasteful. They stain easily, scratch easily and expand and contract in different temperatures, thus cracking the layer of wax on them of them, allowing moisture to seep in between the cracks, and then encouraging the growth of mould. Honestly, it is such a lousy quality floor, why do people even bother with them?? Not to mention, we probably kill a lot of trees. I still think tiles are best.Anyway, i have been fretting about the care of the hardwood floor in the new property i rented. The owner is very particular about the floor since he specifically drew up a special clause about it in the lease i signed. It stated that i should pad all furniture and keep my dogs' nails trims in order to prevent scratches to the floor.I was searching what kind of applications would be best, when i came across this site - Soft Paws.An Excerpt from the webs ...

Crash 2007-08-18 02:55:00 I had a good day working in Starbucks today. Put in an 8 hour shift but certainly did not feel a single minute of it. Was put on bar with the experienced baristas, handling the crowds that came in from the footy matches. It was peak hour and i handled it well. Then i was put on register and that was good. Had hearty laughs and funny conversations with my colleagues so everything went well. Last night was shit because i quarrelled with my mum. But i have also decided that i honestly need to sit down and get my life in order. I can understand why my mother is so worried. I am always moving from one place to another, and it is a strong indicator that i am not settling down properly even though this is almost my third year here in Aussie.I have decided i have to cut all the distractions around me and just mind my own life. Other people can go to hell. I have been stagnated for quite a period of time. I thought about it and sorted some of my issues so now i am all clear and set to go. I am ...

Trying this on Gmail, and assuming subject means title 2007-08-16 19:23:35 I am typing this entry using Gmail. The hospital has previously blocked access to Blogger after i first accessed it; i reckon it was some privacy concerns. I have thought of a way to bypass that, by emailing my blog directly, but i ain't too sure how successful it will be. Anyway, it's good i am able to email my blog (that is, if this goes through), because then i get to give you guys a more accurate update of what the hell i am doing. I spend most of my time in the hospital, so restricting access to Blogger means that i will not be able to blog for days in a row since i am almost always too exhausted when i get home. After i updated my blog this morning, a couple of events happened. The new agent, Darrell, called me to let me know that the owner has accepted my proposal of an extra thousand dollar bond so that my dogs can roam free in the house when i am at home, instead of being confined to the massive courtyard alone. He also wants me to go down to sign the lease today. I th ...

Oh my God, the stress 2007-08-16 19:23:13 I have been talking a lot with the other research students based in the same department as me. I have shown them photos of both houses. Basically, both of them just looked at me and said, "Maxs, you really really want to move. You sound like you just need someone to tell you to move. Go ahead. I reckon it is a better idea to stay in the suburbs as a long term plan. Safety? Everywhere is not safe, you just need to be streetwise, is all!" I know. I really want to move. I cannot get rid of the image of the courtyard in my head. I cannot stop thinking how little in damages i will have to pay if i leave my dogs in a huge courtyard unattended the whole day (and sometimes the whole night), rather than in a 3 storey Townhouse. I don't mind the distance and the travelling time. It did not even occur to me that it could be a problem; so honestly i think that is quite insignificant. But i am looking at removalists now, and i am a bit uncertain, what with the amount of assembling and disassemb ...

Affirmation 2007-08-16 19:10:00 Yesterday before i was due for my shift to start (i was half an hour early), i sat in the cafe sipping my free coffee and a panini. I was still besieged by all the emotional crap. I think finally i realized it has to stop because it was starting to affect my research, and if anything, med school is still my top priority. Anything that threatens that status has to be resolved promptly.I thought through my options, reflected on the past and mused about the present and the future. In the end, i made my decision. When i spoke to Pink Bottle about it later (i had to sit at the train station to make that long distance call, because believe it or not, i have more privacy outside than at home), she affirmed my decision. She echoed the views of everyone else that i should really avoid Tiara because she was having a very large negative impact on me. Pink Bottle is a very rational and logical person. We have known each other for years; so when she repeated what everyone has been trying to convey ...

Feeling upset 2007-08-15 23:55:00 I think i am PMSing and that has an additive effect with the unsettled feeling i have leftover from last night's encounter with Tiara. And i am brooding a lot again and it is written all over my damn face. I do not know what to do with Tiara and the process of leaving the Townhouse has started for me already. I have visualized myself leaving the Townhouse, and packing all my stuff up. And then memories back from College where Tiara and i would pore over our textbooks to cram for our exams and simultaneously check for properties on the internet, over a supper of unhealthy roast chicken from the supermarket flood my mind. I recall the countless trips we made to the Townhouse, troubling Aiken to open up the house for us as we took measurements and decide and discuss what sort of furniture we should get and where we should place them. I still remember very vividly the empty space waiting for us to fill with life...and now we are moving out, on a very different note. We did not even last ...

Phonecalls and whispered conversations 2007-08-15 10:30:00 Phone calls in a home which you are sharing can never be completely private unless the other is not around. I like my conversations private, and when i do have chats with my friends back home, and especially when i am the one who makes the call (speaks for a lot about my sincerity doesn't it? Sigh, i am working on that, give me more time!), it is something of utmost importance that i cannot work my head around. And a matter that can give me a headache of such magnitude is normally very very personal and probably involves someone really really close to me, or something in my life that i am very much involved in.Eastie shrieks every time i call and blames me for straining her ears. Pink Bottle relies on contextual clues and apologizes furiously for not being able to hear properly. Lin tries her damnest to figure out what the hell i am talking about.This is what is happening at the moment.And what exactly is bothering me such that i need to talk to my friends with such urgency?Definitely ...

Freedom - a combination of excitement and curiosity 2007-08-15 07:50:00 The verdict is out - I'm moving.I signed the lease today after a more thorough check of the house. On closer inspection, i realize the house is older than i thought, and for a fleeting moment, i did wonder exactly what drawbacks an old house might have, but that was immediately jostled aside when i looked at the big picture.The night before i had taken a look at the house. The street was admittedly very dark, and i was filled with jitters about walking alone past midnight. But as we progressed down the street, it got slightly brighter, and i saw neighbours looking at us because we are strangers in the vicinity. So the people in the neighbourhood are vigilant, that's good.I also discovered that the new place is located one house away from a private hospital. The house sandwiched between the new property and the hospital was incredibly eerie, and on first sight, i was like what the hell?! and actually almost banished the hope of signing the house (i was really disappointed when the pos ...

Woke up with the sunshine streaming through the windows 2007-08-13 18:12:35 I woke up in an insanely good mood again. It is a cold morning (5 degrees Celcius), but unexpectedly i found sunshine streaming through my windows onto my bed where i was nestling very comfortably with Kelly and Daxter sprawled beside me.I love waking up with the sunshine on my face. Best thing to wake up to every morning.I have been sleeping in every morning, maybe that will explain why i am in such a good mood. I realize i am not required to go to Hospital V early in the morning, as long as i get my work done.Anyhow, there are a lot of changes in store for me. For example, getting Tiara to transfer the gas and electricity bills from her name to mine. I am also considering about subscribing to the daily newspapers (also currently under her name), but i am not too sure whether i have the time.This morning, i woke up actually wondering again whether i should move. However, a quick check with the news showed up 2 break-ins in houses, one man was shot in both legs, and another was a 92 ye ...

One full circle 2007-08-13 17:58:26 A little while after i wrote the entry about Uncertainty, i gave the new agent a call regarding the house i was eyeing. I told him i was willing to bump up the rent from AUD$360 to AUD$380 a week. He understood my dilemma. I was glad i called because the agent seized the opportunity to clarify some of the stuff i have written on my application. If i hadn't called, i doubt he would have asked. Also, unknown to me at the time, i think he called my current agent, Aiken to double-check my reference because of my phone call. Several phone calls to inquire about more properties later, and each one giving me a negative reply, i grew pretty dejected. At that point, i was already increasing my initial rent from AUD$350 to AUD$380, but still i wasn't hitting pay dirt. I sat down and thought about it. I couldn't just keep increasing the rent you know? There has to be a ceiling to what i can pay, and if i still cannot find a house, then how? I thought about it and i realized the rent i was will ...

A dying breed 2007-08-13 08:56:14 It just fills me with a heavy heart that people no longer know how to be true friends.I realized now that i have grown very distrustful of people. My barriers are much higher, and i think i will let them stay that way.There are a few good people in this world, but i think i have already met my quota of them.Everyone else just want to manipulate the other for their own self-interest. ...

Uncertainty 2007-08-12 19:48:22 This post is going to be some sort of a ramble; may or may not make sense, but that's all right, i think i need to vent it out a little.I have been searching for houses the past week, including this week. My initial plan is to sign a lease by end of this week, start packing by next, and move out by end of August. But it has been a very dreary process. True, now that i have extended my property search to the suburbs, where there are a lot more houses whose landlords are more negotiable in terms of being dog friendly and it is definitely better than being limited to the city where prices are exorbitant, space is cramped and the extra bond i have to fork out to entice the landlord is cut-throat; but there is a catch. The houses are much larger, there are good-sized backyards, then they ask, so are you staying alone? I have a feeling that a student staying alone in a massive house is not going to bode well with the landlord. Also, i saw my competition. The minute they introduced themselve ...

Conflicting conduct 2007-08-08 10:58:02 Words never meant anything to me. I told you that many times, but you never heed my warnings. Only your comportment matters. You can speak with words thickly-laced with honey, but i am oblivious to them. Your behaviour, on the other hand, is like a loudspeaker, broadcasting your every thought and every intention.My conscience is clear, my integrity is intact. Given the chance to turn the clock back, i still wouldn't have done any different, because i still placed value in our friendship, faith in you, belief in things to come.But i only grieve that you did not share the same values as i do, the important principles of Life that i hold dear. You can behave in whatever manner you want to, burying more and more knives into my back, and i will not flinch. I will not stab you with a single object. I will be quiet and just move on, because we used to be such good friends. I had hopes that we could be lifelong friends, but optimism can only last this long, when it seems i am the only one wit ...

Eye-balling 2007-08-06 16:32:00 I have been up since 6.30am. I know i should not whinge, but i am so tired. I don't know why i seem to be getting insufficient sleep every night. I have a good mind to skip going for my research tomorrow and just turn up at the Emergency department around 5pm, and then hang around till midnight. I learn more that way.Last night, a bunch of us were on the tram heading towards Dumbo's apartment. It was crowded, not intensely crowded, but you get the idea. There was this girl, woman?, i don't know, a female in her early twenties, dressed in Gothic attire, hogging two seats. She sat on one, and placed her bag on the other. She was frowning and glaring. I caught her staring angrily at Diva a couple of times. Like i say, it was crowded, so when people jostle one another to get off the tram, those seated might get bumped now and then. But this girl was in a supremely foul mood. She was just openly showing her anger at Diva. Diva, of course, being her usual self, did not seem to notice.I wa ...

Time to close the doors and move on 2007-08-05 18:07:00 Closed door policy.The heaviness of it all.Tit for tat?OrBe a doormat?Do you know why i haven't been decisive in my way to manage your poor behaviour?Because i think the silent treatment is the most cruel response you can bestow on a fellow human being.I can easily do that to a stranger, but you ain't a stranger.So i planted the ball in your court, and i waited to see what you would do.And you threw it right back out, and it did not land in my court (though i know you say it will be, and that's the saddest part of it all).And that's how i made my decision.An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth.You are 27 years old. I think it is time you mature and stop giving me, a 21 year old so many problems.A lot of my friends are aghast at your behaviour. But they are more disgusted that i am putting up with it.I have progressed past the point of feeling the sadness at the way our friendship is turning out. I have fought my heart out to salvage this situation.I am taking a different strategy n ...